is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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