Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
