ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
