Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
