im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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