This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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