At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
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I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
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I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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