DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
