You smell like stripper and shame
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
