I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.