he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.