you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
