I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize