If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
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