Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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