guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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