Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
