what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Randomize
