Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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