Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I just sucked dick on a ferry