How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
