just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
