that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
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I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
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You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
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