Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Randomize