Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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