y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize