nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
