if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Never underestimate the power of titties
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
