"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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