Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
