I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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