I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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