why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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