She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
