All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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