Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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