I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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