Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
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