Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize