I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
PANTIES FOUND
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