I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize