my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Two words: nipple clamps
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