Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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