the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
