it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
