Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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