im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
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