I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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