Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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