I accidentally burped into my bong.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
