That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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