After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
