Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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